Through Her Eyes: Survivor

Through Her Eyes: Survivor: Things can look so sweet on the outside but can be so bitter on the inside. Now that I'm not embarrassed by my past anymore I can now give y...

Survivor

Things can look so sweet on the outside but can be so bitter on the inside. Now that I'm not embarrassed by my past anymore I can now give you a glimpse of walking in my shoes. "As a woman I made mistakes, as a woman I gave my heart to the wrong man, as a woman I crawled through the violence with shame and fear of death, as a woman I cried myself to sleep countless numbers of nights but as a woman, out of all I'm a survivor." Most of you wouldn't even think that this ^ would define me but it does. I am a victim of domestic violence. I have been beaten everyday brutally to the point where I was scared to leave. Swollen face, bruises, cuts. Not once, but everyday for over a year. This boy told me he loved me, right after telling me he was going to kill me at that very moment. This boy told me every compassionate word there was to hear. I was so blind, so scared, so embarrassed that I stayed in the life that was a lie, so that I didn't have to explain myself to anybody. As girls we only hear what we want to hear.We except the good and tune out the bad to make ourselves believe that everything is ok. " but he says he loves me" words mean nothing. Love is not violence. Love is not pain and suffering. I now know that because the MAN i have now is the compete opposite. Love is kind, gentle, compassionate, patient, selfless. If I never went through any of the pain in my past I would have never known what love was. What it felt like. The joy. The feeling of someone loving you so much you are able to close your eyes and fly. Don't settle for what you think is okay, what you can handle. Your life is worth more. Let the world see your smile rather than having to hide it under fear. My past does not define me. As bad as it hurts to say I'm a victim, I'm proud to say that I'm a survivor.

Through Her Eyes: Me. Unfiltered.

Through Her Eyes: Me. Unfiltered.: Maybe Visibility is what is needed. No one knows the real you until you let them in. Today is like the rest. Life is a routine but rather...

Me. Unfiltered.

Maybe Visibility is what is needed. No one knows the real you until you let them in. Today is like the rest. Life is a routine but rather than disliking it, i enjoy it to the fullest. At 22 i can say that I've been through, what i cant say "it all" but what feels close to it. Mom is good today. Even though the MS is wearing a grin...so is she. She tough. I know thats where i get it from. Danny, my oldest, a Leukemia fighter, shows me everyday the meaning of life. The importance of faith. The severity of not handling things alone and where it gets you. Although at times my eyes are filled with hate and anger and question, i am reminded why i have these feelings. Why i was chosen to with go so much. Im not perfect but i am proud to be a christian. Proud that i know what im fight for. The after life is my reward. There's no stopping now. Not here.